So let me tell you about this girl that I’ve been fucking with
For like 7 straight years, and all these 7 - 8 fears
Don’t mean shit when I cock 9
And even the thought of being cuffed couldn’t block mine
A straight shooter but it’s getting harder to Walk The Line
In Middle School, I heard what she did at the ghetty, plotting how I could get the bitch to never forget me
Post Valentine’s dates, fuck the teddies, thinkin’ of goin steady, so my palms was gettin’ sweaty
Yeah, she liked to get stoned like Rosetti, but when I smoke my cigarettes, she’d condemn me, said it’s deadly
My mind is on her sticky wet jelly, will she prefer if I bust on her forehead or her belly?
I liked DOOM, she prefer Machiavelli, she’d wanna go out, my eyes is glued to the tele
Call me the virgin surgeon, red shirt sweaty thief, never askin’, never askin’ are you ready?
I told her if you’re unhappy, please tell me, she said I couldn’t live without you, you’re the Ryan to my Kelly
But I want to be the Jim to her Pam, like is it really that hard to be her ideal man? Damn.
I’m in love with her novelty tees and her wobbely knees, the love she constanly pleads for
Now my heart has dropped a couple degrees, I’m playing Fer Elise with ease on her pink keys
Geez, be pleased to know, I stole second base, and I’ll know in her face when her family’s names in disgrace
She say my name and it sounds like its lowercase, baby, be honest, do you dream about how I taste? Nahh.
She bendin’ over, I’m just trynna get some leverage, scrapin’ some of that ice off her cold shoulder for my beverage
Distressed shit, up in arms, sleepin’ restless, ambidextrious, so her arms never get tired.
Me and my bitch look like The Captain and Tennille, we had planned to run away at 24, Shaquille
O’ Neil, well, the way I feel had been revealed, like bitche’s privates shoppin at American Apparel
Didn’t like to nag but I seriously wanted an earful, ‘Marry me’ in her ears just so I could see her cheerful
The beer flows and the hands gets to slappin’, but she know I love her, ain’t no reason to feel fearful
Knows that someday I’ll be on the cover, mad suspicious if i think this bitch is lookin’ at another
Didn’t want to meet her mother or her brother, just wanted to film a snuffer and stuff her in the duffler
She know I hate my white tees retainin’ purple tags, grippin’ the Mac in the left, right, it’s a Virgin Mary
Admiral Akbar acknowledges the traphouse, playin’ cat and mouse with two cops named Tom and Jerry
Damn. I guess.
I was in love, and I’m so sorry for admitting it, her name ain’t Juliet, fuck, I’m on my unrequitted shit
She ride my Nimbus 2000, on my Quiditch shit, I’m fiending for her Magikarp, I want her in my Pokedex
Hold up, I’m adjusting, while she busting, always lusting for a little extra bump of that something
Not justin, but I do Belieber, when she swear her pretty beaver ain’t angry if I decieve her
It dont take alot of my effort to please her, she never grabbed my lever, T’was a pleasure to receiever her
Took an Alleve cus I’m in need of a reliever, such a pretty ass in tights, her petite perfect keister
I’m eager, dick is rising like Easter, grades is droppin’, but I never really been an overachiever
I’m either the last gentleman or his keeper,
Why she couldn’t say yes to white fenced, gold retrievers?
I say I love her, she tell me she know, dolo like Leia after Billy Dee froze Solo
I fold hoes, but with her, I guess I’m Cold Close Case and I ain’t never really been a big fan of Bones
Damn, I’m alone, and it’s been far to long, blame your mom for passing down the love for the Fonz
Used to be in love, now I stare down at my arms, the scars seem to spell ‘Fuck his and her firearms’ forreal.